Change!

As of October 31st of this year Brian and I were no longer the owners of the farm out in Dassel. I moved Brian up to Fridley to an apartment right across the street from his work a year ago in October. At that point in time it was absolutely a necessity as we could no longer afford the cost of commuting and still be able to keep our heads above water. I remained  out on the prairie until the house sold, then it was my turn to move to the apartment. Letting go of  things has always been a challenge for me. Perhaps it is because I love so deeply and become so attached to everything, I'm not sure why, all I know is that it hurts and  it causes me a lot of emotional grief. This time was different because it wasn't just one thing that I had to give up it was many things. It was my lifestyle, my family, my friends, my farm and everything on it, and my two very special companions, Fred and Blaze. Although Fred has a very good home I ended up putting Blaze with the SPCA. He has some very special needs as he was a feral cat that I had been working with to domesticate. He was soooo close but still had one thing to learn, litter training. No one would want him if he couldn't make that final transition. I had to sign him over to the humane society and had to give up all rights to him. I'm not even allowed to call and find out how he is doing but then I'd be crushed all over if I knew that he was still fighting and struggling with being in captivity. He loved his freedom! I don't blame him, I love it to. Does it sound stupid that I pray for Fred and Blaze every day that their transition will be made easier for them. They stayed by my side as I fought cancer and their purrs always comforted me. It was harder to give them up than it was to give up all my dreams for the farm. I need to stop and just let it go!

Now I am here in Fridley with Brian. Along with moving comes getting ones self reestablished, which I have been working towards.

 After filling out tons; ok- maybe not tons but a number of pages of medical history ect. I finally  saw my new oncologist, Dr. Tim Larson. He is very easy to talk to and so is his nurse. He checked my lymph nodes and  my abdomen and didn't find anything out of whack. The next thing was the blood draw. After 30 minutes of waiting I finally got the results. I am now into remission by 4 years and 3 months!!!  it is time to celebrate and do the Happy Dance once again!