Finding Peace and Quiet

Ever since the last doctors appointment I have not been a very happy person.
In fact I would say I have been a very cantankerous person.
The doctor sat down with dad and I to lay it all out on the table, including the bad side effects that come from being on these chemo drugs.
Among them, permanent nerve damage, sudden cardiac collapse of the blood vessels, and leukemia. That was suppose to make me feel better?!!!! I wonder in whose book! Needless to say I was upset and feeling anxious but the thing that was hardest to take was that the one person who should be putting the brakes on and looking for better ways to handle this- the one person who should be protecting me and comforting me was excited and feeling upbeat as the doctor was trying to say out the other side of his mouth that I'd be okay. I felt like I didn't even know this man that I had married. He wasn't protecting me from harm, he wasn't concerned about how I was feeling all he wanted to know was if the doctor was going to hit me with a full dose of all those nasty chemicals to which he replied "yes". I wanted to scream. I was so angry. I felt betrayed by the one person I felt that I could trust to take good care of me. I felt like he was playing a game of chicken with me on the railroad tracks and the freight train is due to arrive on Monday. I felt so angry and betrayed that I could not talk to Brian. I didn't even want to be near him so I slept in the living room last night and got up early to go to the temple. I needed to have some peace and quiet where I could talk with God without having the phone ringing, without being interrupted by any one or any thing.
I desperately needed to have some time alone with God.
It felt wonderful to be able to sit down in a quiet, reverent, atmosphere and be able to study the scriptures and to pray.It felt good to know that someone was listening and that he was there to comfort me. Thank Heaven for the temples, they are a refuge from the storms of life.